We all wanted to be grownups when we were kids. We wanted to skip all the years of school we would have to go through, naps were so boring and we wanted to experience the world that our parents did. We wanted to partake in all the “big kid” activities. Being a kid was so boring.
It is officially the end of the semester in one week. In one week, I will officially be in my fourth- and final- year of college. I will be moving into my first apartment and paying my own bills. I will be starting my first internship this summer, which will be the equivalent to a full-time job, while I begin searching for an internship for the fall semester. In one year, I will be walking across that stage, accepting my Bachelor of Arts in communications studies, with a minor in music with an emphasis in liberal arts. In one year, I will officially be in the real world.
I think it’s safe to say that I’m very quickly becoming a big girl, and I also think it’s safe to say that I’m already terrified of how close the grownup world is.
It isn’t until reality is staring you right in the face do you realize just how ill-equipped and unprepared you are for the real world. I have already delayed my being thrust into the real world, as I am supposed to graduate in the fall but have decided to take one more semester to “job hunt” and “prepare for life after college.” I may have one more year, but I now know how sheltered I have been my entire life. If I were thrown out into the world, forced to find a job and live completely on my own, I’d probably crawl back home crying and begging for help.
The last two weeks have been filled with tears and goodbyes. I’ve had to say goodbye to the seniors on the STAR and the senior women from my sorority who are graduating. I’ve heard everyone say how scared they are for real world- women who have held many more jobs, many more positions of authority, many more difficult majors than my own. They feel they aren’t ready to be a big girl just yet. I’m going to be in their position before I even know it.
How am I supposed to be ready for the big girl world in only a year?
I know that I will have to try and enjoy this summer, because it is probably the last time that I will be able to enjoy being a kid before my year of college. Soon, job searching, house hunting, paychecks, bills, marriage (eventually), kids, a career and the rest of my life will be in front of me.
I don’t know how I will handle the change. I may want to run and cry, but something tells me that I won’t be able to do that. I have one year and counting- here goes nothing.
